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Quotes by Fran Lebowitz

"Food is an important part of a balanced diet."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"My favorite animal is steak."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"Nothing succeeds like address."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"The telephone is a good way to talk to people without having to offer them a drink."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"If your sexual fantasies were truly of interest to others, they would no longer be fantasies."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"Humility is no substitute for a good personality."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"I do not believe in God. I believe in cashmere."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"Vegetables are interesting but lack a sense of purpose when unaccompanied by a good cut of meat."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"Being a woman is of special interest to aspiring male transexuals. To actual women it is simply a good excuse not to play football."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"Favorite animal: steak."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"I figure you have the same chance of winning the lottery whether you play or not."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"When you leave New York, you are astonished at how clean the rest of the world is. Clean is not enough."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"I never took hallucinogenic drugs because I never wanted my consciousness expanded one unnecessary iota."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"Special-interest publications should realize that if they are attracting enough advertising and readers to make a profit, the interest is not so special."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"My favorite animal is steak."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater, suggest that he wear a tail."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"Stand firm in your refusal to remain conscious during algebra. In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"Humility is no substitute for a good personality. "
By Fran Lebowitz
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"Having been unpopular in high school is not just cause for book publications."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"Life is something that happens when you can't get to sleep."
By Fran Lebowitz
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"The controversial overachiever is someone whose grasp exceeds his reach. This is possible but not attractive."
By Fran Lebowitz
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