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Quotes by George Burns

"Too bad all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxi cabs and cutting hair."
By George Burns
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"Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples."
By George Burns
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"Too bad the only people who know how to run the country are busy driving cabs and cutting hair."
By George Burns
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"I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty."
By George Burns
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"Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city."
By George Burns
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"I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty."
By George Burns
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"The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning anf a good ending; and have the two as close together as possible."
By George Burns
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"First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down."
By George Burns
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"Too bad the only people who know how to run the country are busy driving cabs and cutting hair."
By George Burns
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"Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples."
By George Burns
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"No snowflake in an avalanche ever feels responsible."
By George Burns
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"I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate."
By George Burns
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"I get a standing ovation jaust standing."
By George Burns
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"I'm going to stay in show business until I'm the last one left."
By George Burns
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"Nice to be here At my age it's nice to be anywhere."
By George Burns
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"Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years."
By George Burns
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"I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age."
By George Burns
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"Too bad the only people who know how to run the country are busy driving cabs and cutting hair."
By George Burns
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"I'd rather be a failure at something I enjoy than a success at something I hate."
By George Burns
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"Everyday happiness means getting up in the morning, and you can't wait to finish your breakfast. You can't wait to do your exerc"
By George Burns
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"Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city."
By George Burns
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"Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed."
By George Burns
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"I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty."
By George Burns
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"Age to me means nothing. I can't get old I'm working. I was old when I was twenty-one and out of work. As long as you're working"
By George Burns
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