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Quotes by Harold Howe II
"Teenagers go to college to be with their boyfriends and girlfriends they go because they can't think of anything else to do they"
By Harold Howe II
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"When I was a child, there were times when we had to entertain ourselves. And usually the best way to do that was to turn on the"
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"There are many stages to a man's life. In the first stage, he is young and eager, like a beaver. In the second stage, he wants t"
By Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
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"I guess I kinda lost control, because in the middle of the play I ran up and lit the evil puppet villain on fire. No, I didn't."
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"If you're a boxing referee, it's probably illegal to wear a bow tie that spins or changes colors."
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"Instead of burning a guy at the stake, what about burning him at the STILTS It probably lasts longer, plus it moves around."
By Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
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"I think a good gift for the president would be a chocolate revolver. And since he's so busy, you'd probably have to run up to hi"
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"If you ever reach total enlightenment while you're drinking a beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose."
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